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| Blogs > myelin36 > Dirty Little Secrets |
Would You Consider This?
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Would You Consider This? FYI network continues to baffle me with its season premiere of “Married at First Sight,” a reality show that lets experts match singles up with life partners. The twist: Contestants must marry the person they get matched with, sight unseen. The challenge: the newlyweds move in together for six weeks, then decide whether they want to remain married or get divorced. The marriage “experts” on the show include a clinical psychologist, a sociologist, a sexologist, and a “spiritual advisor.” The group pool their collective wisdom to develop a lengthy personality test, which they gave to 625 marriage-minded singles. Dr. Joseph Cilona, the show’s psychologist, says the matchmakers used “CIA- and FBI-grade instruments” to evaluate everyone’s personalities and select three couples to act as guinea pigs in their social experiment. (The show is a remake of successful Danish TV program.) What these "experts" are doing may seem like an arranged marriage but it is almost nothing like a typical arranged marriage. A traditionally arranged marriage, a custom that is still relatively common in countries such as India, is usually brokered by family, religious leaders or some other third party, but gives the couple a chance to get to know each other before exchanging vows. The show claims it relies on science and data to create perfect couples; issues like appearance (or your zodiac sign) shouldn’t be important when someone is a match for you on a deeper level, their expert matchmakers claim. On “Married at First Sight,” couples aren’t allowed to meet, see photos of one another, or even learn the name of their intended spouse before they’re literally walking down the aisle. Proponents of arranged marriage, including a couple of the experts on the show, suggest that those types of relationships generally have a lower divorce rate than “autonomous marriages,” where partners pick each other. I think this show is a potential social experiment gone wrong. What say you? Would you put your faith in the hands of so-called "experts" to pick your soulmate sight unseen?  |
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no way
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Well firstly would like to know the relationship history of the "experts", though that matters little. It's one thing to find a compatible partner, its another thing to stay married for life. Certainly not an expert, but likely any social anthropologist can see that this is not an arranged marriage. There is no cultural, religious or family dynamics that are central to the concept of the traditional arranged marriage. As we understand it, those still practicing arranged marriages in the West believe the basic tenants that your family knows better for you than you do, that love grows during marriage. This is contradictory to the "falling in love" aspect of the West and can not see how these folks that participate in this can suddenly change their belief structure. We consider this low brow reality tv. It's not that this wont work for these couples, its just the spectacle of it all, like naked dating, the bachelor, etc - just sap.....now The Walking Dead - thats a show!...lol
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I like Hickory's comment that people need to discover reading. I've not seen the show, but I don't know how any panel of "experts" could assess that intangible spark necessary for a lasting relationship.
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90% of the "reality" shows accentuate how really desperate and/or dumb some people are. This seems to be just another one. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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Nope, there's too much stuff that's "beginner" about me to put that kind of decision into an "expert's" hands! I want somebody who knows me as I want to be, to have them privy to my dreams and aspirations, both professionally and personally, and to support them is a crucial part of a relationship for me. This type of arrangement seems based on commercial viability, curious if there have been any people matched on there that had disabilities or were anything other than attractive heterosexual 20somethings.
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I'd do it. I'd look at it like a blind date. I'm sure it's set up similarly to an online dating site "matching" system. Ultimately there is an out, should it not be in both persons best interests. Approaching the unknown, committed to the effort is part of the experiment. These people know what they're signing up for. Hopefully they're going through with it for the right reasons and not being greedy for some exposure.
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I get a chance to bail after 6 weeks, right? Are the women hot? Is sex assured? If it doesn't work do I get another six week trail with another woman?  But let's not get too serious here, this is a TV show after all!!In answer to you real question, I can see some logic to arranged marriages, or maybe I should say “marriage suggestions”. HNW, Before and After InBetween Bawdy Toast for St Paddy39s Day It Made Perfect Sense to Me [post 3312759] My Private Blog – Tell me All your Secrets
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18/3/2015 11h45 |
Um... no. Marriage -- betting more than half your worth to live happily ever after? Never again.
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I think it's a good theory. But I also believe that people aren't honest with themselves enough. Therefor when answering questions that should be important, they will lie. Wanting to believe it's the truth. Wanting to believe that they are better.
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No one is more shocked than I am to find that I am surprisingly tolerant of the idea. I have seen quite a few disaster marriages that would have been prevented by a filtering system like this. It's in our genes to be attracted to the bodies of members of the opposite sex, even when the pairing will be unpleasant for both parties. I do not believe that this is the optimal way to pick a spouse. But the show could perform a true public service if its message was: "Left to ourselves, lots of people suck at picking life partners." My featured post this week: Pulling Fantasy Sex Out of My Ass.
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No I wouldn't let any expert especially one I don't know very well choose my life partner for me. I'm not saying that an outside party could not make a better choice for a partner as all to often people get caught up in the up front appearances with out getting to know the real person. That "Blinded by Love" disease is what keeps people from getting to know each other on a deeper level sometimes. If one or both parties are not open and honest you can wind up with an awful mess that neither party is happy with. Personality tests are easily manipulated on purpose or even accidentally if people are not honest or don't know themselves all the well (many people think they are something they are not or are not something they think they are). Sometimes the questions can be misinterpreted. I think as time goes by in the show they will find some of their contestants would have been better for "Survivor" if you know what I mean. However that being said the premise could work well for some people. Some definitely will not work out well (however the experts will be picking the people on the show so if they do their jobs well and are not just looking for ratings and the people they pick are honest then they should have a high success rate. I'm sure the shows experts and producers have different ideas about what they want to have on the show ratings wise. Ultimately any show is put together for ratings and the advertising dollar or it will get cancelled. I'm not saying that all shows are put together just to get ratings but if they don't hold peoples interest they wont be on long. Do you think the ratings/advertising issue will cause the show to pick people that will provide "excitement or viewer interest?" I wonder, do you think they will have many narcissists on the show? Will they weed out the people with problems or include them? I don't know if the marriage is actual or just a pretend thing for the show. I would say that if they were really looking to make good matches to last a lifetime it would be better to let the people live together rather than get married to a stranger. Marriage has many legal issues that in my opinion would say any person agreeing to those terms is a fool. I think the reason the divorce rate is so high in this country is because people are not so limited by financial restraints and social prohibitions. Of course religion is also a factor. Other countries have women at a disadvantage sometimes rights wise and socially. Just because they have a lower divorce rate doesn't mean they have a happier married population. If you have more rights and financial means you have more choices. I find it interesting that the Catholic religion just changes a divorce into an annulment for so many people in this country. I've known people that were married for years and had children but after their divorce one of the partners went and had their marriage annulled (I mean really WTF   ). Where does that leave their kids? According to the church the parents were never married, therefore the kids are illegitimate if I understand the meaning of the words, but of course the church has it's own views on how things are defined don't they. Have your cake and eat it too. I don't think much of reality shows in general. Vive La Difference
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i tend to have little faith in all things popular media! 
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The fact that arranged marriages have a lower divorce rate is a rather superficial analysis. There dozens of socio-economic factors involved, most of them involving the ability, or more precisely, inability of women to support themselves. Usually, pre-arranged marriages are not made fot the emotional benefit of the two being married, but, rather, one family is trading their daughter for economic benefit. Meh... I could go on, but that's just bullshit. Smart as a horse and hung like Einstein.
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sounds more like e-harmony taken well beyond the limits without the religious component... and, haven't FBI and CIA level instruments missed those who have sold damaging national secrets to enemies?
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I don't think I could either watch or be a participant in a show like this. It's analytics at its worst..... Click Here To Read A Hot Erotic Story: When A Woman Meets A Stranger Part 1 of 4
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I don't have a very good track record on my own, I don't think they can do any worse. I said I was never getting married again after the first one...... Take three...
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Would there be a reason to marry anyone you don't know? I think it could Work, but these experts are not so good like the think. I would probably give it a try If this persönlich would really fit my taste... Maybe.... Never say Never Ich bin offen für fast alles! Wer mir schreiben will, aber nur Standard Mitglied ist klickt hier
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We live in a world where no one is able to make a decision for themselves. When you shop, theres a message "other people who bought this, bought that also." Its the land of the instant gratifications, dont do the work and others do it for you. "To Be Consumed" Blog : I want to be your drug of painful withdrawals.
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