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A single Christmas  

Platosgames 102H
2246 messages
9/12/2018 15h33
A single Christmas


I did the majority of my Christmas shopping yesterday online. Was a lot better than fighting the crowds, but still sorta a hassle. Seems when I checked out I had it on the wrong card. So had to cancel all the orders, and redo the whole list and check out again. Felt like an idiot.

Before anyone asks...sorry I didn't get any of you anything.

While I was shopping, it dawned on me, that I wasn't dating anyone. Have no FWB, girlfriend, significant other for the first time at Christmas in quite a while. Not really sure why it took me this long to realize the obvious, but I finally figured it out.

I mean it's not all bad. Guess it will save me some money on a present or three. But it does mean there will be no Christmas Eve sex. Which in my book is a major negative point. I mean, I guess it's not much different from the fact that I didn't have sex last night, or the night before that either. Oh, God..now my minds going to "when was the last time you had sex". Let's put the brakes on that one.

It's not just the lack of sex though. At least not for me. Most of the time, I do fine when I'm not dating. Just seems like all of a sudden, I'm noticing a hole in the festivities. Like not going shopping with a friend. Not going for dinner down at the Riverwalk to see the lights. Well, at least not a romantic dinner. Might take my daughters.

Now, of course as it moves further along, all of that will be lost in the chaos of kids coming into town. A road trip to see my daughter and grandkids, that's almost more driving then visiting. Christmas eve over here, Christmas morning over at my sons. Just a wild and crazy escapade starting this coming Thursday. But still.

I'm sure some of you are in the same boat as me. Does it seem different around the holidays for you? Do you not really see any difference? I mean, I think most of us would love to find a great "partner", matching whatever acronym it is we're looking for, no matter what time of year it is. It's just hitting me differently today for some reason.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 15h34

And after reading that post on here yesterday with all the pics of Santa getting some, I'm thinking, "Damn, even St Nick is getting more than me right now.".

Oh well, here's to a Merry Christmas anyway.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


positively4you 74F  
4605 messages
9/12/2018 16h01

I do miss it at Christmas. I am busy with family but it can make you aware of being alone. The worst holiday for me is Valentines Day.
As a rule, I am okay being alone. Sometimes those days can make you feel a little left out I guess.


SeaGirlFL 60F
9220 messages
9/12/2018 16h16

Um. Hmm...

Well, I haven't had an "other" for six years, so really this year is no different than last. And while, for the most part, it has been fine, I have missed just having a partner to go to holiday functions with, or bounce ideas off of for gifts for the kids, or even just driving around looking at Christmas lights.

Just sitting here realizing that before I got married there were no "others" at Christmas either. I have no idea what that is like. With my ex, our first Christmas, we were engaged...that is pretty much the same as being married.

I have been feeling "more single" of late...what has hit me hard this year is that there isn't anyone who is going to be shopping for me just because it brings him joy to give me a gift. And it has absolutely nothing to do with a gift...I don't need anything...it's just having someone who is paying attention to what is going on in my life everyday, and wants me to know I'm important to him. (Does this make sense? I'm not even sure if it does to me...)

Oh, yeah...and the sex...thanks for the reminder, lol. I'll be missing the Christmas eve sex now, too. Lately what I've been missing is just sleeping next to someone.

Well, now I think I want a glass of wine.

"Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is relax." – Mark Black


lonlyforlove2 81H  
32704 messages
9/12/2018 16h19

Young Man, I had nearly 20 years of this and the loneleness does get worse, I understand missing the closness we get used to but for the last years it has been better and continues that way , also more expensive, LOL have a good day

Stop by at lonlyforlove2
also see Lunch with Lonly , we get snow tomorrow
Check my blog on New Community, "A photo of my big Pecker"
also, " My Sunday afternoon with the kids'


superbjversion2 68F  
24388 messages
9/12/2018 17h25

If this is your first Christmas without a date in "quite a while" count yourself blessed. There are many others with sadder stories.

I'd come down and be your Christmas elf - if it wasn't so darn hot down there!

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


pagancountrygirl 66F
6466 messages
9/12/2018 17h53

Hadn't really thought about it, until now. Now I'm thinking about being all alone...and certainly no sex, on Christmas Eve or any other time in almost 2 years. I think I'm depressed now. Oh...and then you tell me you're not getting me a gift. Ugh....

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h03

I think that's sorta my attitude at the moment.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h04

    Citer positively4you:
    I do miss it at Christmas. I am busy with family but it can make you aware of being alone. The worst holiday for me is Valentines Day.
    As a rule, I am okay being alone. Sometimes those days can make you feel a little left out I guess.
Yeah...Valentines is always difficult. But i can find ways to make it ok...Christmas i'm in such a great mood, it's a little more difficult.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h08

    Citer SeaGirlFL:
    Um. Hmm...

    Well, I haven't had an "other" for six years, so really this year is no different than last. And while, for the most part, it has been fine, I have missed just having a partner to go to holiday functions with, or bounce ideas off of for gifts for the kids, or even just driving around looking at Christmas lights.

    Just sitting here realizing that before I got married there were no "others" at Christmas either. I have no idea what that is like. With my ex, our first Christmas, we were engaged...that is pretty much the same as being married.

    I have been feeling "more single" of late...what has hit me hard this year is that there isn't anyone who is going to be shopping for me just because it brings him joy to give me a gift. And it has absolutely nothing to do with a gift...I don't need anything...it's just having someone who is paying attention to what is going on in my life everyday, and wants me to know I'm important to him. (Does this make sense? I'm not even sure if it does to me...)

    Oh, yeah...and the sex...thanks for the reminder, lol. I'll be missing the Christmas eve sex now, too. Lately what I've been missing is just sleeping next to someone.

    Well, now I think I want a glass of wine.
Ok...for a little bit, were opposite. I think I'm missing going shopping for that special gift to give someone I care about. Does that make sense. But I rarely get many gifts, Christmas is truly a thing about giving for me. I love watching people as they open gifts.

And not to split hairs, but sleeping next to someone is paled by the feeling of waking up next to someone. I love that.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h09

    Citer lonlyforlove2:
    Young Man, I had nearly 20 years of this and the loneleness does get worse, I understand missing the closness we get used to but for the last years it has been better and continues that way , also more expensive, LOL have a good day
Yeah that does seem like it would get worse. To be honest, I'd rather spend it alone than with my ex. The final 10 years or so, it was just a battle to feel anything.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h11

The word "void" is probably the key. It's not like I'm not used to being alone for time periods. It's just this holiday season, has me feeling singular.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h13

    Citer superbjversion2:
    If this is your first Christmas without a date in "quite a while" count yourself blessed. There are many others with sadder stories.

    I'd come down and be your Christmas elf - if it wasn't so darn hot down there!
Hell, it's in the 30's so come on down. I'll put the air on if you need it. But I'll be wearing thermals and a coat. Unless you have some idea's on keeping me warm.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h18

I remember the first Christmas losing my dad. I feel for ya.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h19

I'm not sure why it hit me this morning. Not like I haven't been without for a bit now.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
9/12/2018 18h21

    Citer pagancountrygirl:
    Hadn't really thought about it, until now. Now I'm thinking about being all alone...and certainly no sex, on Christmas Eve or any other time in almost 2 years. I think I'm depressed now. Oh...and then you tell me you're not getting me a gift. Ugh....
Ok..there's what I was waiting for.. I thought about this bringing others down. But lets just wallow in our misery together. At the least, you can know I'm with you in solitude this Christmas.

That doesn't help, I know.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


AsianJ11 49F

9/12/2018 18h43

It may seem different for me, but I am slowly finding me again after being missing for so long....after hiding in my bedroom....instead of just leaving...it feels so damn good!!!!!?


pagancountrygirl 66F
6466 messages
9/12/2018 18h52

"Ok..there's what I was waiting for.. I thought about this bringing others down. But lets just wallow in our misery together. At the least, you can know I'm with you in solitude this Christmas.

That doesn't help, I know."

Nah, I'm actually good. I was just pulling your leg. Uhhh...that WAS your leg I was pulling...right?
I may not have a SO in my life right now, but it doesn't really change how I view Christmas. It would be an added bonus if there was someone in my life, but it's still good.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


SeaGirlFL 60F
9220 messages
9/12/2018 19h19

    Citer Platosgames:
    Ok...for a little bit, were opposite. I think I'm missing going shopping for that special gift to give someone I care about. Does that make sense. But I rarely get many gifts, Christmas is truly a thing about giving for me. I love watching people as they open gifts.

    And not to split hairs, but sleeping next to someone is paled by the feeling of waking up next to someone. I love that.
Oh, I'm the same when it comes to giving gifts...I love giving...I love to see the excitement and joy when I give. Partly why I make gifts...most people don't do that, so they feel extra special that I made something.

Okay, so you are right about that, it's the waking up next them that is really the best part...especially that middle of the night waking up for slow sleepy sex...

"Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is relax." – Mark Black


yesmamallthetime 56F  
11278 messages
9/12/2018 20h36

I have a pretty sad story as far as having a partner for Christmas goes. Can we say since 2001? I had some great Christmases not even thinking about a partner as I had my family, taking care of my Mom. Christmas was about her having the whole family together on Christmas Eve. It was our tradition. I have not spent Christmas with anyone for two years now. I could have gone to some family member's houses but I did not want to drive due to bad weather. Now one of my sister's moved 3 hours away and another brother has moved away too. I think the best I can hope for is phone calls or texts with folks. It's a good thing I don't have cable or I would feel worse with all the Christmas romance movies on eh? Screw Lifetime and Hallmark movies! LOL

Independently Romantic Sounds Better Than Lonely


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h09

I'm in the same boat then...thanks Jack.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h10

    Citer AsianJ11:
    It may seem different for me, but I am slowly finding me again after being missing for so long....after hiding in my bedroom....instead of just leaving...it feels so damn good!!!!!?
I can relate to that. The journey back to finding yourself, can be well worth a time of being alone.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h11

    Citer pagancountrygirl:
    "Ok..there's what I was waiting for.. I thought about this bringing others down. But lets just wallow in our misery together. At the least, you can know I'm with you in solitude this Christmas.

    That doesn't help, I know."

    Nah, I'm actually good. I was just pulling your leg. Uhhh...that WAS your leg I was pulling...right?
    I may not have a SO in my life right now, but it doesn't really change how I view Christmas. It would be an added bonus if there was someone in my life, but it's still good.
Well if it has to be just a leg, I guess I'll take what I can get.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h13

Yeah..I think that's whats been running through my mind this weekend. Trust me, I'll still have a fun and enjoyable Christmas, but there will be something missing.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h14

    Citer yesmamallthetime:
    I have a pretty sad story as far as having a partner for Christmas goes. Can we say since 2001? I had some great Christmases not even thinking about a partner as I had my family, taking care of my Mom. Christmas was about her having the whole family together on Christmas Eve. It was our tradition. I have not spent Christmas with anyone for two years now. I could have gone to some family member's houses but I did not want to drive due to bad weather. Now one of my sister's moved 3 hours away and another brother has moved away too. I think the best I can hope for is phone calls or texts with folks. It's a good thing I don't have cable or I would feel worse with all the Christmas romance movies on eh? Screw Lifetime and Hallmark movies! LOL
Yeah...that is is sad. Someone with your heart shouldn't be spending Christmas alone. Hell, no one should.

Stay away from the movies. LOL

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h16

Starting about Thursday, the kids and grandkids will have me so busy I won't notice it as much. haha.

Here's to you having a great Christmas morning.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 5h17

Well, now I realize I won't have a "other" for new years either. LOL.

I'll get by, I always do.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


CampoGirl 57F
43434 messages
10/12/2018 9h01

I'm missing all the children that use to be in my life... from a son, nieces, grandbabies... theyve all pretty much grown up and away. Im missing them so much as CHristmas gets closer. Its sad they are suddenly jewish and lost to Santa now. Granddaughter is young, but FORCED to be jewish in her traditions now. Im not allowed to see them... Im not a believer in their ways!

Now on my Blog: 👄 New Pictures 👓


superbjversion2 68F  
24388 messages
10/12/2018 10h28

"Unless you have some idea's on keeping me warm."

Well - you know what the Beach Boys say about us Northern girls!

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


Tmptrzz 61F  
107039 messages
10/12/2018 12h53

It really sucks when you think you have everything done on line, and then BAM you use the wrong card. I don't shop on line ever!!!

Sounds like some fun escapades for you and the kids and grand kids be safe driving out there.

And being alone does suck during the holidays hell I don't get Christmas sex and I'm married lol. As far as shopping we skip Christmas for the most part..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 13h22

    Citer CampoGirl:
    I'm missing all the children that use to be in my life... from a son, nieces, grandbabies... theyve all pretty much grown up and away. Im missing them so much as CHristmas gets closer. Its sad they are suddenly jewish and lost to Santa now. Granddaughter is young, but FORCED to be jewish in her traditions now. Im not allowed to see them... Im not a believer in their ways!
Wow...I can't imagine not letting family members see your kids because theyre a different religion. That's gotta suck.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 13h25

    Citer superbjversion2:
    "Unless you have some idea's on keeping me warm."

    Well - you know what the Beach Boys say about us Northern girls!
That is a very good point.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
10/12/2018 13h26

    Citer Tmptrzz:
    It really sucks when you think you have everything done on line, and then BAM you use the wrong card. I don't shop on line ever!!!

    Sounds like some fun escapades for you and the kids and grand kids be safe driving out there.

    And being alone does suck during the holidays hell I don't get Christmas sex and I'm married lol. As far as shopping we skip Christmas for the most part..
Yeah..it really sucked. The minute I hit the key i thought...Was that still on the business card? haha...

It's always crazy around here for Christmas, but always fun.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
11/12/2018 6h52

Yeah...ok. I'm gonna stop bitching now. Lala, I truly hope you find someone great, soon.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
12/12/2018 13h20

You know it's funny, I was thinking back to some Christmas when I was married. They weren't much different than this year. haha

Hope yours is a great one Wonder.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


FMAOPLS 70F
27112 messages
15/12/2018 14h57

I have found Christmas depressing for quite a long time, and it's probably because I haven't had a partner for almost 20 years, and Christmas was "never the same" after my kids left the house.

I used to decorate like a fiend, but got rid of almost all my decorations, since I now live in a small apartment. I have a 3" foot table-top tree, but haven't decorated for about 8 years, and that was only because I had my extended family over for dinner that year.

I KNOW, the season is supposed to be "all about family", but going to dinner at my sister's and then just coming home, to my lonely little apartment, to be All By Myself Again, just makes me even more aware that I am All Alone.

It also doesn't help that when my son comes home, he stays at his Dad's and spends a lot of time with that side of the family, and I'm lucky to fit in 1 hour with him.

My grand-daughter goes back and forth to my daughter's house and her Daddy's, and my daughter alternates dinners at her Dad's house, or at my sister's with my side of the family. This year, she's invited me over for Christmas morning gift-opening, and I am going to ask if I could sleep over the night before - just so I can have more than an hour with her and my grand-daughter.

I KNOW I get depressed, I try not to, but I'd much rather sleep through the whole season and wake up when it's over. I NEED to change that.

Check out my profile or and become a "watcher" of my blog FMAOPLS,to learn more about me, and for intelligent, lively, smartassy and fun discussion, with a little irreverence thrown in. "Like" or comment on my photos, and I promise I'll add more. Thanks.


Platosgames 102H
3189 messages
16/12/2018 6h12

Staying over the night before sounds like a great idea. Get to wake up with the little ones. put them to bed the night before. I always loved the night before with the kids.

" I refuse to belong to any organization that would accept me as a member" Groucho Marx


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