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The wish
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The wish I was nervous. Damn, I was always nervous meeting for the first time. My hands were clammy. My antiperspirant was going into overdrive and I was sure there was some food stuck in my teeth. Probably had bad-breath too. Couldn't they make this all simpler? Maybe some secret necklace or handshake? Nope. This online stuff eventually meant meeting. What I dislike the most about it is you can't help it but you have some expectations. Sure you expect the awkwardness and the odd moments of silence but really it's about the connection. The first five minutes usually tells it all. Funny but in the first five minutes you tend to know whether the other could be who you've been searching for and craving. The one with that smile that melts your panties. Unless they were lying. Then it's usually further conversation and emails that give it away. You can't really hide the truth about a person. So I was sitting down and waiting. Sipping an iced coffee and opting for the caffeine. I needed all the energy I could get. The hell with the doctor for suggesting decaf - a has to do what a has to do. He walked into the shop as I watched. I could see him scanning the crowd looking for that special one who matched the profile. His eyes passed over not quite recognizing me and I smiled. Afterall - does everyone really look exactly like some picture taken at some moment in time? The smile seemed to get his attention as he refocused on me. I felt that zing go through me to my toes. Gosh darn - I was going to squirm in my seat. That zing, that awareness when you look at another and find that something - that perhaps chemistry. Maybe he felt it too. Why is it a smile can change someone so dramatically? Maybe it is that knowing smile. That one that suggests forbidden wishes. He walked over and smiled. He introduced himself. He could tell my brain had already taken over. I was analyzing him. Trying to see exactly if he was who and what he said he was. I could tell he was doing the same. I like to call it 'the scan'. The look from head to toes of the other. Noticing the way they talked, smiled and moved. That body language that tells the other everything or maybe nothing. Does clothing really define the person or is more body language? If I show off enough cleavage - is it making a blatant statement or merely showing off assets? enough to be comfortable in my skin - if I wore a big baggy sweater would he wait to see if I could hold a conversation or would he judge me on looks? Are looks sexier than words? A million questions went through my head. None of it really matters - the first five minutes can be the judgment or the pursuit or the kiss of death. He was leaning in close, to make the conversation more intimate. Mmmm he smelled so good. I really did want to lick him up like an ice cream cone even in public. Not that I worried about the table next door overhearing - that didn't bother me. I always figured I could give them something to talk about or spice up their uneventful lives. Maybe he was just enjoying my cupcake scent. You had to get real close to smell it. all about subtle. Subtle and seductive. Is there anything sexier? The conversation was easy. That's usually a good sign. Enjoying another's company and conversation are critical to a meet. Plus let's not forget the chemistry. I was attracted to him. I loved his voice. I loved his intellect. I felt it. For me, it is more than physical - though of course, that helps. I just love someone who can engage me in a conversation. As we were talking I was admiring his lips and wondering exactly what it would feel like to trace them with my fingers ... so slowly. Then move in closer for a light sweet kiss - the kind that feels soft and feathery. I wondered if he knew where my thoughts were moving. Would he be thinking more romantic thoughts or would his thoughts be more lust filled with sweaty bodies and devouring mouths? It's always so hard to tell. I was wondering if he was a good kisser. Does he linger? Does he provoke? Does he tantalize? So so so many questions. He smiled. Perhaps he could read my mind. With that knowing smile on his face, he asked if I wished to meet again. How does one answer that question right away? How do you know if it feels right? How do you trust your gut when you have all those butterflies in your stomach getting in the way? Not such a simple answer.... but it felt right. Sometimes you just have to take that chance and see.... |
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1 message 21/4/2019 18h24 |
Your evil
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Thanks. Yes sometimes you have to just kinda take that chance and other times well ya gotta know when to run!
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It all comes down to comfort. If you are comfortable and no red flags, go for it. But if it doesn't back off. Any true Gentleman, like myself, would understand and be more patient if it's something you both want to pursue.
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15/1/2019 17h23 |
just take the shot
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