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| The adventures of a gurl trying to find herself |
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Am i feminine
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Publié :15/10/2011 17h38
Dernière mise à jour :16/5/2024 4h20 2076 vues
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Last night I was being flirty, doing a bit of a show. And someone said that I looked masculine, body shape and body language and posture.
I was shocked, being feminine is something I have always prided myself in, always tried so hard to perfect.
So who knows how I appear now.
So please help me.
Post comments on here, am I a man in a dress, am I feminine, am I mutton dressed up as lamb.
Let it rip as however, painful the comments made, will be to me. I can use the experience to grow and become the woman I am.
rose
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Cock photos
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Publié :17/12/2010 13h19
Dernière mise à jour :29/12/2010 11h26 2230 vues
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What are men saying when their profile picture is a dick. Are they saying look at me I am a complete dick. Well that is what I immediately think of them. Why else would they post such a picture.
Do men always think they have the worlds biggest or fattest or sexiest cock.
Are men saying all I am is a cock, there is no substance no intellect to who I am. All I am is just a fucking machine.
If all I want is something to fill up my orifices, dont people realise I can use a dildo. Then I know how clean it is, I dont have to worry about insisting on safe sex and I can clean it up afterwards to my level of hygiene and then just hide it away in the back of the bedside draw.
But is sort of gets worse, because when one is broadcasting a webcam - men just seem to think we are some sort of whore. Where are you can we meet up tonight, they say. Expecting us to suddenly get in our car and drive for a liaison to meet their sexual needs.
After all, all I may want is to flirt to feel sexually desired and yet the first words from the voyeur is a variation of make me cum tonight online or in person.
I want to be wooed and flirted with I want someone to make the effort to get to know me.
If I just wanted cyber or instant sexual gratification. Then would I not just set myself and make money out of men. After all if these men want to treat me as a way of meeting their sexual needs why would I not financially exploit that situation.
Being here just makes me realise more and more that I am just not a man, because I cant think the same way that most men think in this place
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1
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Webcam
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Publié :14/12/2010 11h37
Dernière mise à jour :1/3/2011 11h15 1940 vues
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Last night was my first night using a webcam here.
It felt so liberating, it was so much fun.
At one stage the stats were saying that 30 people were watching me and quite a few people did message me.
The idea that strangers were watching me, were contacting me to tell me how attractive I was. Well as you can imagine it did a lot for my self esteem.
When I am me in the real world, I am always full of self doubt, do I look like a man in a dress, Oh I am not as beautiful as other women, what do people think.
But here it is different, If people do not like me, they can just move on to see a different webcam.
I enjoy flirting so it was fun and of course the more I flirted the more feminine I felt and the more I flirted. I felt I moved more female, and all the time I was smiling because I was having fun.
Now it is strange and it may well be a reflection of me being neither male or female, but the idea that men were watching and getting erections at seeing my imperfect face and clothed body was exciting. /the idea that men were stroking their penises as they watched or talked to me was exciting. That is because for me it was validating who I am and what I want to be.
I want to be desired both intellectually and for my personality and to be desired in a carnal way.
In the future I want to be on cam and watching those men as they talk to me seeing the look of desire in their eyes. Looking into their eyes as they eat my body with their desires and seeing that desire that need in their eyes.
And of course some of those men I want to see their desire and needs in a physical way watching them get an erection looking at them as the play with their penises watching them when they can no longer hold onto their desires and they masturbate and cum.
Yes I want to be a page 3 gurl, I want men to desire me so much that they play with themselves and let their needs wash over them and they collapse in a sweaty heap of cum after I have met their desires and satiated them
I will keep writing here and let you boy and gurls and girls get to know more about me.
So while you are watching me, you know what I am thinking and thinking what a nawty boy you are, You very nawty boy who cant keep your hands off your dick.
Dont pull too hard or it might cum off.
Rose
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1
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My first Post
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Publié :11/12/2010 17h10
Dernière mise à jour :29/12/2010 11h24 1992 vues
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This is my first post here, but hopefully it will be the first of many.
The reason for this blog is in some ways to keep a bit of a diary of my journey, trying to find the gurl within me.
Although I have gone out in public as rose. Shopping, lunching and dining. As well as going to fetish venues as rose. They have always been with close friends.
Now I am trying to find myself, trying to find friends as rose and being able to meet those friends as rose.
For everyone here i am rose, no one else. I am not the male part of myself but rose and here people will only know and see rose. When or if we meet in the real world it will be rose that you will meet and she will be your friend.
This is really about rose creating her identity.
Here i will share the trials and tribulations of becoming rose and hopefully everyone can watch her develop.
rose
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